Reginald Arvizu is known by his stage name Fieldy. He brought a noteworthy blend of slapping and fingerstyle bass playing to the band Korn, catapulting it into a world famous and extremely influential rock band, credited with inventing the “nu metal” style of music, an aggressive blend of punk and heavy metal with hip hop grooves and dissonant sounds.
Like many successful artists in the music industry, wild partying and drug use characterized Korn’s and Fieldy’s lifestyle, leaving him stuck in the throws of addiction. However, through aggressive work on his recovery, and the positive influence of a newfound Christian faith, Fieldy has gotten a second chance to live life again, clean and sober.
In 2010, Fieldy published a book Got My Life: My Journey of Addiction, Faith, Recovery, and Korn, in which he offers a brutally truthful account of how his faith rescued him from a deeply destructive lifestyle.
The Struggles of Childhood
Like many people who struggle with addiction, Fieldy grew up with seeing substance abuse as a daily reality. His parents drank heavily, encouraging the young Reginald to start drinking as a very young child. His parents hosted many parties and drink heavily, which would make them become violent and abusive.
As a teenager, he responded to pain caused by his parents’ divorce by repressing his pain and drinking heavily. Even has his musical ability and notoriety grew, he “never spent a day sober,” taking speed as a way to maintain the skinny “look” popular among hair metal bands at the time. When his band Korn became a massive success, it allowed his drug use to reach new destructive heights.
Consequences Sink In
In an interview with Tim Branson on the Christian Broadcasting Network, Fieldy reflected that, under the influence of drugs, “I became really mean… I was triggered easily to become violent.” Seeing a destroyed hotel room after a night of wild partying would create feelings of shame and guilt, as well as shaking and vomiting from “coming down.”
To calm down, he abused Zanax and Ambian to calm down, then turning to marijuana and alcohol as the night progressed, a cycle that lead to a state of perpetual “buzz.”
The Path of Recovery and Finding God
This was a buzz that kept him from dealing with his internal heartbreak. The turning point for him came when his father was diagnosed with cancer. From him, Fieldy had seen firsthand how being “born again” and embracing the Christian faith could radically transform a life.
Under the influence of his father, Fieldy converted to Christianity, a decision that proved to be the beginning of transforming his lifestyle to one of recovery and sobriety. “I was forced to think about my life…what I’m doing to myself and what I’m leaving behind.”
Forgiveness
He prayed to be set free from all the substance abuse issues that had enslaved him, and then spend a year asking for forgiveness from all the people he had hurt. Accepting grace for himself from Christ made a huge difference, allowing him to experience a life free from the throws of addiction, and with forgiveness for the pain he caused under its influence.
For a while, Fieldy says he struggled with guilt, or thinking himself unforgivable, demonstrating the hopelessness that keeps many addicts from feeling like they can change. His Christian faith has assured him that God has forgiven him, helping him to recognize that he can forgive himself, seek the forgiveness of others, and recognize that “I’m still a work in progress,” never letting mistakes keep him from growing and recovering.